Leg 1 of connecting the families with their books 4June – 25July
Leave a commentAugust 19, 2014 by the UBUNTU girl
For a recap of the journey back to the uBuntu families, click on the first image and follow the journey into the hearts and homes of South Africans.
Leg 1 connected 49 of the 150 original uBuntu families with copies of ‘The uBuntu Girl’ book! Leg 2 will commence in September 2014.
Marjan fresh from Belgium-partners on LEG 1 of the journey back! 6 books to unite with uBuntu families today #tugBOOK
Henschel & I laughing as we remember how we were almost arrested together as we trespassed Koeberg Power Station (p68 Mattress Fiasco). When we arrived she said she was surprised that I followed through with the book and came to find them again. It was a special moment – being able to fulfill a promise. Henschel has a deep understanding of what it means to be connected. She speaks HEART fluently. She speaks about wanting to fold those in pain, into her heart. Because there is SO much space inside her ever expanding heart, not because it is her heart, but because her heart is connected to the bigger heart.
Tannie Brenda & Oom Christi – Paternoster. “As you came into our homes, we have to go into one another’s homes” p76 #tugBOOK
An emotional handing over of the book to Maryam – her story ‘No wrong people’ is very emotional as it is in memory of her late husband, Armien Mogamat Alie. He was a patient man who spent a lot of time explaining the Muslim culture and religion to me. Maryam says that I have misunderstood his explanation of what ‘forty days’ mean. She says it does not mean that you know when you are going to pass on, but rather that your actions in the last forty days before you pass away, is seen in a different light by those you leave behind. Your actions would have been inspired by a bigger hand,Allah p71
Member of Parliament, Patty Duncan, hands Marjan a pin of the South African flag to wish us our journey well. Then she explained what the colours of our flag represent for her: Red = hardships fought in the Struggle; Black and white = the different people of South Africa, Gold/Yellow = our mineral wealth; Green = our fertile land; Blue = the Ocean. Although different people may attribute personal symbolism to the individual colours or colour combinations, no universal symbolism is attached to any of the colours
Ella Groenwald from Langebaan gifted Marjan and I this trolley, to help us get the books to the families! Thank you Ella. And so the generosity continues. Not only are the families excited to receive their copies, they are excited for and want to help us get to the other families x
Cathy Croxford from Langebaan receives her copy of the book – catching up on family life over a lekker glass of wine
Moment of divine feminine connection: Me, Antoinette Brand & Marjan Meganck It feels like I never left…
An emotional reunion with Bettie Bester – we chat about seeing one another as individuals, rather than a crowd.
We are saying farewell, not only to the West Coast, but also the borrowed car AND straight roads – yes, our road is winding – Marjan and I are heading off on foot with our trolley!
I made the call to return to the families with the same backpack. This time there will also be a laptop in it’s 33 litres! So, 2 sets of clothing is all there is space for… oh, and a space blanket and rehidrate and a poncho…..toiletries, socks and underwear
Beryldene Stemp from Guest Speaker with her amazing kids. I just broke down when I thanked her for their part in the uBuntu girl book journey. Without the speaking engagements that they booked for me over the past three years, and support from their corporate clients, I would not have been able to sustain myself and the book would also not be here. RAW emotions
There can not be many groups of 20 friends who comes together to pre-buy 35 copies of a book – yes, before it is even in existence. Thank you Charité for orchestrating this. Thank you for the shared passion for our country and building social bridges.
WHAT WERE WE THINKING??? Meet the trolley
Angelina Taitai from Kayamandi (Stellenbosch) receives us with open arms and fat kisses! She talks of how she always smiles. And because she always smiles, there is always something to smile about
Meet Reuben. When we were on the train platform in Muldersvlei, we asked about opportunities to get from Worcester to Montagu. Reuben said that there should be taxis. We ended up on the same cart as him. He disappeared for a while at one point, but returned to tell us that he spoke with one of the vendors on the train. The vendor, Jerome, will take us to the taxis when we arrive in Worcester, because he had to get off a few stops ahead of us. Then, after a lot of curious glances at the cart, we got talking about the mission of our journey – opening doors for real conversations.
OK, so there were no taxis….
Marjan and I are also making NEW uBuntu families. Meet Magda in Montagu. Magda and her family took us in (her children slept on the sleeper couch)
The stories in the book, truly come to life, when new people are introduced to them and share their thoughts and own uBuntu stories. This is Shannon. She said that we do not always know how to take that first step.
My heart is a bit sad. We were looking for Enrico & Ricardo, the streetkids (p 59), but could not find them. We even asked a policeman, Cupido, whether he knew where we could find them. I wanted to share with the boys how important their story is, not only to me, but how it affects other people. I know that this will be helpful for their journey of valuing themselves. Cupido offered to try and find them, returned hald an hour later with some news. One boy has moved on to Oudsthoorn and the other one is in Salt River. We will keep trying to find them.
Original uBuntu family, the Lombards (from p53): Hercú, Monia and Jurie. Special people. I always think of them when I do dishes, because one of Jurie’s favourite sayings is: “Kyk, dit het al moelik gegaan, maar ons het nog altyd vuil skottelgoed gehad” (times have been tough, but they have always had dirty dishes). Marjan and I are very grateful to stay with them and to dirty some of their plates x
Hercú making sure that we don’t get up to no good!
Maria Storms (when I ask her what her name is, though, she says Kaffertjie!) finds herself in the book p56. She signed her name for me in my copy! We chat about the challenges her children are facing to find jobs after having matriculated. She shared something with me that she says to encourage them: “As jy nie met min kan regkom nie, kan jy ook nie met baie werk nie” (if you can’t come right with a little, then you also won’t manage with a lot)
It is not always about people. Sweet sweet nature, thank you
Marjan’s first time in a truck. Freddie took us (and e-Troll!) from just outside Montagu to Ladismith in his truck
Freddie, the truck driver says that it is not as difficult to live in harmony as we sometimes make it out to be. His advice is to sometimes just step aside, look at the situation calmly and then step back inside with a more open approach – a side by side approach.
Ok, so the Trolley that Ella gave us, has been named by Sefton in Johannesburg: Her name is e-Troll… And walking along SA roads with her, is called: e-Trolling
Back of a bakkie. Wind in hair. Childlike freedom. Even at the high speeds the driver was going at. The knowledge of, ‘we are not in control’ comes back into my veins
We could not find Charmaine (p52) when we got to Calitzdorp. She was a ‘bergie’ – a homeless person, when we met on the journey. We found Dina instead and she told us that Charmaine has found a job. She is away during the week and returns on the weekends. She also has a home now and is actually Dina’s neighbour. She will give the book to Charmaine.
Interacting around the book. Mr Valentyn (p53) and others at the municipality in Calitzdorp
So, we receive a Facebook message from Trevor, who cut my hair a couple of times in Cape Town; who has moved to Calitzdorp and is now a potter!; offering us a place to stay. We arrive with Hercú and Kaffertjie’s raisin bread – through Trevor we meet the most amazing people and Marjan even speaks Flemish with Hylton Nel who lived in Antwerp for two years. It feels like we’re in the Matrix – and we’ve taken the BLUE pill……
Waking up was not easy. We shared space with a horse. No, a dog, Dorothy; 3 cats (1 a playful kitten!); a potbelly pig, who wanted to eat us….REALLY!: a ball of hair, I mean a dog, Oliver; chickens and the sounds of nature all around. Caffeine helped! So did the 2 degrees! Eina haha
Then Trevor offers us the use of their bicycles! I immediately think that this will add an interesting layer to the story. NOT: Oops there are only 7 gears and we are about to head into Swartberge territory OR Oops, we have big backpacks OR oops, we are quite unfit. We say we can’t though, because of e-Troll! Don’t worry, a lift can be arranged for e-Troll to Oudtshoorm, where we can swop back again!
The downhills are fun wheeeeeeeeeeeeee
The uphills…..the UPhills. At the end of a long uphill……
We have a soft start on the bicycles (just as well!) with a lift to Kruisrivier (with Trevor in a bakkie he borrowed from a friend, James). We pop in to see Phyllis Midlane and photographer ROGER Young (though I got his name wrong in the book: Richard!) to hand a copy of the book to them. ROGER then helps us to ‘saddle’ Marjan’s bag to her bicycle
ROGER Young – He gave me a lesson in photography when I stayed with them. I am so grateful to him. He looked through the photos I had taken up until that point and we discussed what made a photo stand out. Ones he liked, I would have deleted. It was because of his advise, that I never deleted any of my images. Some photos in the book, would definitely not have been there, if not for his expertise. Marjan and I walked through his gallery. Astounding visual experience
A different point of view
A different kind of ‘selfie’ – We are SO blessed to be in this part of our country!
Arriving at Carolin’s home to discover that she no longer lives 33 degrees South, but in Knysna. Hope to see her there!
We’re exhausted! Marjan says she needs to lie down. Sitting up takes too much energy! So, we stop. It’s almost 4 when we decide to flag a vehicle down to find out where, more or less we are. We see a sedan. It stops and we meet Apolis and Winston. We are about 45 km from the next host, Charmaine. They are on their way to the Cango Caves. VERY casually, Apolis says that we must go with them. Marjan and I look at the bicycles and then look at the car. NO WAY! Apolis says: No, it will all fit. So, with 2 big hearts and 2 cable ties, the bicycles are loaded into the boot. Marjan and I just manage to get ourselves in the vehicle. We make a call to book accommodation tonight. Our ability to retain information has been turned off. So, being present with people will be a challenge. Wilgewandel, here we come!
Apolis and Winston, refusing money when they drop us off at Wigewandel. We are amazed that the bicycles hardly moved! We can hardly move. A night of good sleep surely awaits us!
FOOD!!! The staff watched our bicycles being offloaded and wanted to know what our story is! And whether we are hungry….WE ARE HUNGRY
Frosty morning bite! To cycle or not to cycle…
Goerge from Wilgewandel, knows Roger Young, the photographer from Kruisrivier. He says something quite profound: ‘Yes, we have to promote one another in this area’ – and I know this will sit with me. Are we promoting one another? Or are we often competing with one another? George offers us a lift into Oudtshoorn with the bicycles. After yesterday, my body immediately says YES! So, we pile in the back of a covered van. As we go over a few bumps, I hear Marjan whispering in her mother tongue, under breath. Then, a big bump and a little scream. “What I need, is an African bum!”
e-Troll! Reunited! Thank you Trevor for arranging a lift for her and a drop off of the bicycles with your friend and artist, Thijs Nel
Joshua is Marjan’s son’s name. We had to take a photo
We wanted to walk for a bit and Marjan and I were on the gravel next to the road whilst e-Troll was in the yellow lane, heading for George. I checked to make sure that there were no trucks. At one point, this little car was heading straight for e-Troll! Oi, move over, man! And then I realised that the driver was slowing down and stopped next to us. ‘Where you going’ followed by ‘OK, get in’ and so we meet Johnie. When he hears that Marjan is from Belgium, he says…’That’s your problem’ jokingly. And the ice is broken. e-Troll happy in the boot
Michelle from George invited us for coffee and a meet up. We know one another from Facebook. There is a strong yoga connection between Marjan and Michelle. We admire her permacultured garden and her words of wisdom: “We need some naievity in this world. More than that, we need faith in one another. Faith in tomorrow” (oh, and with us in the photo is Ferguson, the Scotty)
An easy day all-together! When I was in Knysna on the original uBuntu journey, my sister, Sunette Lipke, wanted to retrace some of our childhood memories in this area and ‘kidnapped’ me from the uBuntu journey. ‘To take you on a holiday from your holiday!’ in her words. We ended up staying with my uncle and aunt, Marie and Erwin Rohrs. Marjan and I are spending the night with them and will head to Knysna tomorrow where 5 uBuntu families will be connecting with their stories in the book.
Marjan and I agreed NOT to talk about the weather. I think that she thinks that I am a sissy, as she is hardly ever cold! (and here she is….caught out!) haha
Finding love wherever we go…even at a coffee shop catching up on writing
When we don’t have to cycle or walk to the next town; when we are so spoilt, that we receive a lift from hosts, then the day can seem a bit longer…especially when all the uBuntu families are working…
and longer….
Ella (The long and short of it) (p40) is happy to meet again in Concordia (Knysna). On the original uBuntu journey, we met in a taxi and she invited me to stay. She was doing township tours with Penny Mainwaring – Emzini Tours. Ella had a dream to help her community by uplifting those around her with food, clothing, confidence, employment, self-worth and safety So, they use the platform created through tourism to bring this about. They run a daily soup kitchen and Lukhanyiso Safe House to mention a few. Emzini means ‘home’.
Ella’s daughter, Lamla (it means to mediate) finds herself in the book! And can’t stop giggling (p43)
We find children to play with – they ADORE Marjan. And they all want to share stories with her at the same time. And they want to see photos of Marjan’s two sons, Joshua(6) and Otis(3) who will be joining us on 1 July!
We are staying in Concordia (Knysna) with Thandi and Mr X – they are a new uBuntu family. They have a 6 month old baby boy and then this little fireball, Oya (her full name is Oyeyam-Intanda). She is SO excited to have two new friends to play with
Oya says good night. She is sending kisses out to everyone!
We are leaving Concordia and heading for Judah Square, during that time of the morning when the light is full of promise.
We decided to walk and Ella sends this little Ntombi to show us the way. She lives with Ella. Marjan and I are convinced that we will see her on TV one day – she is such a character! We are sad to say goodbye. Plus, after she leaves us, we are barked at and manage to detour a hungry looking, aggressive pig! I remember how Ella told me back in 2009 about the Township Five: Chickens, Rats, Goats, Dogs and Pigs
We reconnect with Sista Kerri in Judah Square, the Rastafari community. She is a Knysna legend. I wrote about the new language learnt whilst staying with them. Like ‘I and I’ for we and ‘over’stand instead of understand (p44 -45). Marjan and Sista Kerri chat about what it takes to build a community. In the photo: Iboh (from Jamaica) Julie, Sista Kerri and myself
Sharing information
One of the things I did not really consider was that people might have moved in the time it has taken me to complete the book. For example Anoeschka von Meck (p90) was an uBuntu host in Calvinia, now living in Knysna. She is one of the best storytellers I know and we are lucky that she shares this gift through her writing. She is the author of, amongst others, ‘Vaselintjie’. It is great to meet again – here she is wrestling me for her copy of the book! (She likes it. And that is a HUGE compliment)
Playfulness! Marjan &I have been listening to Anoeschka’s stories. We also had an open conversation about her journey as an Afrikaner. Hectic stuff we were taught/told. We were all in tears- real conversations do that. She shares a story that highlights for me, when we still have fear, anger or hatred, we are almost too reserved or polite to speak our minds; too correct; too careful – ‘Don’t let the hate show’, rather walk away and share the particular interaction with others in a negative way. She now feels the freedom to start conversations, engaging with the hiccups; the joys; the uglies. All of it. Even if it is uncomfortable. Isn’t that real freedom?
Anoeschka takes us to Leisure Isle and what does the European amongst us say? I WANT TO SWIM! What do I say: NO! IT’S TOO COLD, Marjan!
But Marjan’s genuine affection for all things South African, including our winter waters, is infectious. It feels liberating. Breathe! We are in various stages of dress and undress. Anoeschka even jumped in with ALL her clothes on!
Mermaid energy!
The Edwards Family were one of three uBuntu hosts in Knysna
Marjan and I are splitting up for a few days! I’m in Cape Town today to present the book and stories at The South African Book Fair at 1pm, whilst she is working with her NPO, Sterreweg in Plettenberg Bay for a few days.
My first ever book fair – it is slowly sinking in that I have published a book…
This is making my world go round! The pace of the return journey is much faster than the original. Marjan and I have been spending a night at a place. Which has meant NO time for washing. If you look at the photos, I’ve been wearing the same clothes. At least when we hit the road again on Wed, it will be the same CLEAN clothes
We’ve been walking together for 11years now. She was a sort of settlement from a past relationship; I gained custody. She knows the stories I have not found the words or the courage for. This is the first time I’ve had to stitch her up a bit!
And we are back on the journey and reporting a day delayed (Though this post is from Tues evening. I promise we are not having wine with breakfast!): When Marjan and I cycled to Matjiesrivier to give Carolyn her book, we were exhausted by the time we got to her place, only to find that she had moved away. I was sad. I wanted to see her again. We eventually managed to get hold of her, where she now lives in the Plet area. (p48). And, as in the story, we find her with a lit fire and a glass of red wine at the ready.
After sharing stories from the book with the staff at Sterreweg, I was thanked by one of the staff members, Lindelwa, for re-igniting the spirit of uBuntu. We talked about how easy it is to forget that we are here to lift one another up. Sometimes we are prone to jealousy and to undermining the efforts of other – within our homes, communities, government, organisations and even within the NPO sector. Marjan donated a copy of the book to Sterreweg, making the uBuntu circle bigger.
Nel picked us up to take to Sterreweg this morning. He is the driver of the special cargo of special need kids. His driving shows that he is aware of this big responsiblity. The kids come from all corners of the Plet community: The Crags, Kranshoek, Kwanokuthula, New Horizons, Pinetree and others. Nel is an amazing guy! When he is not driving, he is assisting the teens/young adults (16-22 years) with Maths. They use bottle tops to count. Beautiful to watch. He also has plans to help this age group make something that can be sold. But looking at safe options. Maybe embroidery? Any advise?
We are visiting some of Marjan’s friends, Queen &Thembela Mhlana and kids . Marjan bought a copy of the book to give to them. It opened conversations about how little we know about one anothers’ cultures. Thembela shared his insights into the differences within the Nguni tribes/cultures. Wow, we have SO many layers (within layers, within layers)…
A few days ago: This jumping on the back of a bakkie, is fast becoming Marjan’s favourite mode of transport. We found a stray dog. And Marjan and I looked at one another and had the same thought: First there was one girl. Then there was a girl+Marjan. Then we were donated a trolley. So, there was a girl+Marjan+e-Troll. Are we going to be adding to this list….+dog?
We are spending the night with friends of Marjan. Their 6 year old, Jack runs to me when we arrive. ” I looked at your book! ….AND, you went verrrrrrrry far!” Yes, Jack, I went very far. In this photo, though not immediately obvious, is 3 generations of men. The paintings next to Jack was done by his grandfather. And Jack is being balanced by the helping hand of his dad
Janine King, my host in PE gave me a lift to Jeffreys Bay way back when. We drove past a sign for uBuntu backpackers – African Ubuntu Jeffrey’s Bay .We smiled and I knew I would ask them whether the uBuntu girl could stay. They were game. What a cool bunch of surfers. It feels great to hand a copy to Daryn Sinclair – feeling uBuntu-fied! – with
Why have ‘goodie’ bags and buying of gifts become so important in our modern society? Or why is there an expectation from some of us that we have to arrive at someone’s home, bearing gifts? Could we consider that we ourselves are the gifts? Like the lesson from the Sotho gogo (p134). Like the house and car that Ricardo and Enrico gave me on the journey (p59). Thank you Jarret, Liesje and Jack for this gift x
Running behind on updates! So, there will be a few today: Finding uBuntu in the strangest things This was upon leaving uBuntu Backpackers in Jeffreys
Jeffreys Bay, we are on our way! e-Troll and I doing our thing….she’s a real head turner!
Marjan and I heading into Gelvandale in a taxi. We thought the taxi was full as the gaartjie was pushing the last two passengers in and was about to make sure they remain in the taxi, with the help of the door. We were assured that there is space for another two (suddenly our wish for African bums vanished!); both our backpacks….AND e-Troll. I ended up on someone’s lap and Marjan ended up with the backpacks, e-Troll and another passenger on top of her! The real story, however, is how we were helped by a heavily pregnant woman to find our way to Mrs King’s home. She did not want us walking around lost.
Auntie Jean King (p 34-35)
Jess is the beautiful soul who gave Marjan a lift from Pletteberg Bay. Her family, the Reeds, invited us to stay. We shared uBuntu stories over heavenly home cooked meals. And stretched one another’s imagination. We also stretched for a photo…..jump!
Taking a copy of the book to Susan van der Merwe in PE. She has been an avid follower of the journey and loves reading. She has also been on a journey of building social bridges, through living in community with and in various and varied communities. A journalist once asked her opinion about people who were burning tires because of having no electricity. She said: ‘Do you blame them? The cuts happen during the times that people are trying to feed their families.’ This is what we can do for one another. Always endeavor to see things from another’s perspective
We were in PE in a taxi, asking the driver where the best spot to get to Port Alfred/Alexandria is OR if there are taxis going to that area. He called a mate over and this guy walked with us, checked with the taxis. He asked us to stay in one spot whilst he asks. Then the original taxi driver came over. He actually stopped, parked and got out to check that we were sorted. They were all concerned that we might get in the wrong taxi and end up somewhere else. We eventually went in a private taxi. It was very amusing to watch the vehicle being packed. There were 7 of us plus the driver – Can you spot e-Troll?
Shannon! Meet him on page 32. He always takes me into nature. He is nature. He is going to take us for a walk on the beach in the Alexandria area
WOW, this is our first walk on the beach. It serves as a great reminder that uBuntu is not about a connection with people only. It is even deeper than that. Interconnecting with the source of life and with nature. ‘Man’s heart away from nature becomes hard’ ~ Standing Bear
Marjan has an African heart. Now she also has an African head
Aloe. How are you…
Shannon has insisted that we take the day off. He is treating us to a holiday day – we are exploring Alexandria, Grahamstown, Bathurst and Port Alfred. In the woods, in the dunes, we feel like mermaid fairies
When we were in PE, we were given a lift by Elmarie Egling from Eglings Bakery – their speciality is koeksisters! Her van was heavily loaded with flour and other baking goodies when she stopped for us. We detoured via her house first to drop off the ingredients. And of course we were not allowed back on the road without our own pack of twisted sisters. Now we get to share it. That is one of the most magical parts about this journey – we are often allowed to be vehicles for gift offerings between people who might never have met
Water purifying the soul. I chose to maar rather take the photos. IT WAS FREEZING cold!
Shannon receiving his book! He laughed at the photos I picked. He also told me that the Umthombo Fair View Spring (beside the R67 near Grahamstown) has drastically changed. And that he is happy that there is a record of how it used to be
We were allowed to catch up on some work Yip, it is not always just about laughing and having fun
We live in a beautiful land
In Conversation
We spent the evening with Meryl and Rod in their home in the forest – Bathurst. Meryl, with much grace, shared her garden with us
When hitchhiking it is always a good thing to be picked up by a beauty therapist. Meet Charmaine whose salon is at the Fish River Sun (nr Port Alfred)
Yes, it is great to be picked up by a beauty therapist……Before even hearing our full story, we were offered a meal and a break from our trip – back and neck massages! Thank you Charmaine and Vivian
The manager of the Fish River Sun came to introduce himself and thank us for our journey. He even offers us accommodation, but we are too keen to get to Mama Nonthando in Chilumna village. He tells us a bit about the staff and that they have even started a choir. Whilst we were eating lunch, they came and sang for us. Special special (Marjan ‘gooi’ing’ her moves)
After our unplanned time-out, we hitched and caught a private taxi. We ask the driver to drop us off in Chilumna. And tell the other passengers that we are going to visit a very special woman, Mama Nonthando. A young woman, Nosipho, travelling in the taxi knows Mama Nonthando. She is from the same village and offers to walk with us and help us with carrying our bags.
A home coming – Mama Nonthando (p 27-30
p 27-30 – When we arrived there was a whole welcoming committee….OR so I thought. In actual fact, we are fortunate enough to have come at a time when the community is in preparation for a coming-of-age ceremony. Mama Nonthando’s son, Sibongile will be amongst the boys going into the mountains on Sat. We left a book as a gift to the community of Chilumna – Mama Nonthando and friends find familiar faces
The Elders
This is probably the most traditional meal we’ve had so far! Umngqusho – delicious! (samp and beans and love)
Making Umqombothi beer! The women were very gracious in involving us with the process of making this traditional Xhosa beer. Probably because we showed so much interest. We boiled a small amount of water in a black pot on the fire. Then we added imitombo (sprouted sorghum) mixed with maize meal and crushed mealie malt; roasting it whilst stirring. My mlungu muscles were called on to help
The Umqombothi mixture needs to be cooled down
Sun setting over the kraal
Waking up in rural Eastern Cape
Mama Nonthando’s grandchildren, Lithitha and Amzolele gave us ‘love’ take-aways
This is the sweet/sour of it all. Leaving. I think that I will be going around in circles for the rest of my life. I tell Mama Nonthando that next time, maybe I will come in a house on wheels
Before leaving Chilumna, Marjan & I pop in to Zweliyandila HIgh School where we meet Principal Ms NA Dyasi and inform her about FunDza and their online/Mxit library of fun reading. She will share this with the children and especially the language teachers.
In a taxi en route to East London, with spectacular natural scenery, as we go through all the small villages – e-Troll has the best view!
No e-Troll! No time for romance…
Nomi and I. Nomi (p22) overheard me speaking to a vendor at a taxi rank in East London, days before I set off on the journey. She invited me to the home that she shares with her employer, John, the next morning. When I arrived, they had baked a carrot cake, made a pot of tea and teamed up to try and convince me not to go on this journey. ‘The tsotsis are going to kill you!’. With more than a little attitude, I told Nomi, that with or without her help, I’m doing this thing. She offered to go with me in a taxi to Scenery Park where I met my first hosts. The chapter is called Umbilical Nomi, because of the process of letting go. She is my Xhosa mom
John popping a bottle of non-alcohol bubbly to celebrate our reunion. Nomi says that she has been waiting a loooooooong time for this book! She knew that I would complete it
Nomi treats us to a sunrise walk on the beach
Beautiful Nomi – We thank her for having such a calming effect on us
After Marjan’s swim (no surprises there!), Nomi asked her for a yoga lesson. I opted for the role of photographer GO NOMI!
Nomi is amazing. She is keen to try anything! Even this difficult pose. I hope that I will still be adventurous like her when I’m fifty
Every book is accompanied with a BIG letter of gratitude
Nomi took us in a taxi to Frere Hospital, to meet with Phumza. The very first uBuntu host! (p24). And my first time ever to stay in a township (Scenery Park). This was also the first lesson in really receiving. Phumza made a bed on the floor & I thought it was for me. But in actual fact, she made the bed for herself and allowed me the honour of sharing the bed with her child, Lilitha. I felt bad and thought that this was too much to give. It is only later that I started to understand that receiving on this journey, would mean putting my own expectations of what is ‘OK’ aside. I would learn that truly receiving, means that I accept the ‘currency’ people offer
As you may have gathered by now, we are in Jozi! And so starts the second and more ‘cushy’ part of leg 1. Meaning that our modes of transport will change. Already, we flew here from East London and we have a rental till Tues am! Cruising vs ‘Krus’ing
Soweto Book Launch last night – Telana Simpson (aka the Onematchstick Girl) and George Scola (superhero) receiving their copies of the book. Thank you both for your courage and your journeys and for your support
My brother, my favourite brother came through to Soweto for the launch as well. Special. He remarked on what a cool venue Setebe’s Lounge is. We want to come back and jive the night away
This is THE Portia Mahange (p42 & p113). She has been one of the biggest teachers of uBuntu for me on this journey. It is because of her recommendation that I stayed in Orania, though I planned to avoid it. Portia said to me: “You have decided to go on this journey, so you have to keep an open mind; people of Orania are people of our country; and if you’re looking for uBuntu you’ll also find it there.” She also wrote a poem for this uBuntu journey- she is a published poet. I am so fortunate to call her friend x
Beautiful Monique Lawrenson. On p199 there is an infograph about how the uBuntu families were met. 4% of the stays were with friends – The Lawrensons fall into this category. I actually used to work for them many moons ago, managing one of their wrought iron furniture outlets in Fourways. We have walked a journey together since then – Monique also happens to be my FAVOURITE artist. Check her FB page – Molawrenson. Artist and if you’re in Jozi, her work is in the MBW Art Gallery in Nicolway Bryanston — with Molawrenson. Artist and Monique Lawrenson.
Courtney Lawrenson has been my hero since we met in 2000. She was born with one under-developed, blind eye. Though she has a prosthetic eye, she hardly ever wears it. It takes courage and conviction of ‘WHO I AM’ to give up the illusion of how we often see beauty in modern society, for what real beauty is! Cosmetic gives way to cosmic beauty. . — with Courtney Lawrenson.
Genevieve Young. Her and hubbie, Ben took me in after attending an uBuntu talk in Soweto. Gen and I connected on a very powerful, spiritual level. She is one of those people that I can be silent with and feel like we’ve just had the longest conversation. Also, we look ‘into’ one another whenever we meet. She also has a very special way of connecting with teens and young adults. She just gets them!
There have been so many people supporting this journey, in so many ways. Daniel Robus (pictured here with his daughter, Natasha) from iFactory, has helped by just believing in me. iFactory booked me for a couple of talks as well as recommended me to some of their clients. For the past 4 years, public speaking engagements have been my only source of income. Today however, Daniel & I have an open chat about his journey with colour in South Africa. There is a lot to unpack still in this country. He talks of his days in the army and the orders they were given. What a journey! To go from that to adopting little Natasha.
Dumisani Magadlela is a fellow uBuntu’ist! We ‘met’ when he phoned me the week after I returned from the journey. I was in Eshowe living with mom & dad (at the age of 35…living the dream! haha), when I took his call. He introduced himself and thanked me for having set off on this uBuntu journey. He is a remarkable man; a thought leader and a coach in the area of African Leadership. It is great to meet face to face after all this time and I look forward to learning and growing with him — with Dumisani Magadlela.
Elize Botha is friend; spiritual catalyst; uBuntu family member and supporter of the book. If not for her influence in my life, the uBuntu journey may never have happened. She encouraged me to dream through our many South Africa positive conversations and she is also responsible for spreading the uBuntu stories through often booking me for public speaking engagements. Thank you, Elize
We met with Phindi, Vumelani Sibeko’s sister at the airport. Vumelani is the artist (p193-197) from Orange Farm who took me in and spent a lot of time explaining his work and what it means. He is an activist who educates people on issues like xenophobia. There is a powerful documentary made about this (http://vimeo.com/57362285). He is currently on a project of living homeless on the streets of New York and is sharing some uBuntu magic with people there. Here is a clip taken by Angelique Maria, a woman inspired by him – (https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=787124591311308 http://ow.ly/i/65WWR). We need more strong male role like him in our society.
EMOTIONAL REUNION! Marjan & I met online 18months ago when she was researching uBuntu. She has been travelling to South Africa since 2005 and even lived here for a year with her family. She has a strong heart connection with our country &misses the warmth of our people when she is not here. She puts it down to the spirit of uBuntu & facilitates uBuntu workshops in Belgium. We have planned Leg 1 of the journey back to the families together. June was done in a similar style to the original journey. This is about to drastically change as Marjan’s family (partner, Wouter; 6 yr old Joshua & 3 yr old Otis) and friends (Claudia & her 4 yr old, Amalia) join us today!
Yikes! From ‘thumbing’ it to this monster! It feels like I need a code 18…. Marjan and I will take turns to drive us all around Limpopo – not the bend. They’ll be staying in self catering accommodation along the route whilst I’ll be returning to the uBuntu families with copies of the books. We are also doing two homestays (Mbokota village & Sabie).
We are off to a slow start with a night in Centurion to give the little ones a chance to recover from their long flight. And for some planning (oh and awaiting luggage still to arrive from Europe)! But, Centurion is not as built up as one might think….we found a farm to stay at. Mmmm, wonder whether we will have an early morning wake-up call.
This is a whole new uBuntu experience for me, as I am adjusting to having an instant family for a month! Not being a mom myself, I am more inclined to play with the kids, than worrying about the practicalities of feeding them, for example haha! The African Proverb comes to mind: ‘It takes a village to raise a child.’ In a way, I guess on the uBuntu journey, I have been that proverbial child in the village (vulnerable; unsure; not able to always speak the language; asking for help). And this next month, I will learn to be the village as well In this photo: Marjan’s sons: Otis (3) and Joshua (6)
We had to spend another day in the Centurion area as we were waiting for some left-behind luggage. It was great to finally be on the road to Limpopo. Man we live in a beautiful country!
A quick meet up with Louse and Zak Grobler in Bela Bela. Too little time spent with precious people. Somehow, we managed to cram four years into ten minutes. But, we’ll meet again.
We arrived in Vaalwater, not knowing what to expect. We’re being hosted by uBuntu hosts, Peggy and Harry Parham (p167) and they have moved since the uBuntu journey. Harry now manages a lodge outside Vaalwater – this will be our view for the next two days.
Peggy and Harry Parham (p167). They are the most remarkable almost-70yr old couple! And we have the pleasure of also meeting their daughter, Phillipa, here on holiday with her family
What a wonderful place for mamma Marjan to reconnect with Joshua (6) and Otis (3)
The sun setting, is the perfect time for a bit of reflection. We have now been back to spend time with 26 of the original uBuntu families. It is wonderful! I can’t shake the feeling that this is round #2 of many. It feels to me that there are still many more conversations to be had; perhaps on the next round, we should have more indabas; REALLY building social bridges. I think this is my life’s work and I’m only scratching the surface. Slowly-slowly is not the worse way to move forward.
There have been tough days on this return journey. And then there are mornings when you find a spot like this to call your office…
Violet is a strong, beautiful woman and mother. And uBuntu host from Modimolle. She is originally from Zimbabwe and has had to face many adversities. In the beginning it was not easy to live in South Africa, especially in the time when xenophobic attacks were commonplace. Despite this, she saw that there was a need for a soup kitchen in town, where she lives and decided to start one. She remembers thinking that people might ask what this foreigner is doing, feeding them, but decided to do it anyway.
Petro van der Merwe (also p166) is not one of the host families. We met through Violet. The two beautiful, powerful women trade next to one another, selling their wares outside Munchies in Modimolle. Petro fell off the back of a bakkie when she was three years old. She says she does not need a disability grant, because she has turned her disability into ‘this-ability’. Well, unlike me in many cases, there is nothing wrong with her memory: she remembers my name 4 years on! She has also gotten married since we met and says that life is good.
Simon Motshegoa and his mom finding themselves in the book (p170). Since we last met, his health has drastically improved (he had lost a lot of weight due to stress and having lost two very close people in his life). It is WONDERful to see him looking so good. He has also since obtained his masters in Community Development. His mom’s response to seeing me, makes me feel like a real daughter in the home. We are sad to have so little time and I promise to stay over next time.
Limpopo’s winter sky colours, in the middle of the day: golden yellows and pale blues
Another day of waking in limpopo
One of the most beautiful souls – Ivy Mabotja from Lephalale(p170). I am not an experienced enough writer to have captured the immensity of emotions experienced with this family. Their heart is so big; their home always open for others – they are currently taking care of a beautiful 3 year old girl who has no other home at the moment. Ivy is also someone I turn to for advise and to learn from. You will find her honesty&wisdom in the foreword: “We can all learn from this journey. It was an eye-opener for me that someone of Sonja’s culture would stay with people from all cultures. Even myself, I still feel inferior to have a white person in my home”
One of the questions almost all the families are asking, is: WHEN ARE YOU HAVING BABIES? My standard reply is that they will grow up extremely wild! And I’ll probably have to upgrade e-Troll to something more sturdy! One of my Xhosa moms even suggested that I can have the babies and they will raise them for me! PLUS, I also say that I have a lot of families, a lot of children. Here are some of the Mabotja grandchildren. They have kept me on my toes for the past two days
The tough part is that sometimes it is not possible to track down one of the uBuntu famileis. In some cases, like here, I am lucky enough to find one of their friends/family to pass the book on. This is Annetjie Nthabiseng’s daughter, whom I have never met before
From the mouths of babes. This morning 6 year old Dimpho Mabotja was helping me make my bed. We were very impressed with our handy work as we managed to make it look like a Guest House bed! And then Dimpho pipes up with: “Everything, when it ends, is perfect”
After the Mabotjas, it was off to a quick coffee with Susanna Eckhard. As with so many families, this was an emotional meeting and we were both in ‘snot en trane’ (tears) right there in the Wimpy. Susanna said this was simply not good enough and that I needed to come and stay on the farm. Besides, there were friends of hers I simply had to meet. In the bakkie on the way to the farm, peace washed over me. I had a tough few days before Ivy and Susanna’s calming influence – a reinforced understanding of: Everywhere is home.
Susanna was right. Her friends, the van Biljons,from Bronkhorstspruit and I had to meet. They’re on a very special journey of learning &teaching others about farming successfully on a smaller scale on their 3 hectares plot. Gert van Biljon said that he had to unlearn everything his degree in agricultural engineering taught him. We have an enlightening conversation about self-sufficiency. “What I realised is the problem with self- sufficiency is the SELF. Where is the community in that? – like I work my land over here and you stay of my land?” The journey now is one of becoming sustainable within a larger community& learning to farm with few resources.
Marjan+gang and I have been separated for four days already. We are meeting again in a few days in the Louis Trichardt/Makhado area. The challenging part about this return journey has been finding some of the people again. Now, being in this part of Limpopo, at least I understand the challenges of finding cell phone reception! Like the staff from African Sport Hunting Safaris. The farm has since been sold and I haven’t been able to get hold of them. There is a very special girl (Sandra p171), the granddaughter of one of the ex-staff members. I will have to make a trip to Polokwane to find her and we will have to write a story about uBuntu together
Vulnerability. Hestie van Biljon gave me a lift to Baltimore &from there I got to this point (middle of nowhere) with 3 separate lifts. At this point Hano van Rensburg, who made a u-turn, stopped to pick me up, saying it’s too dangerous to leave me there. When I tell him what I am doing, he says that I have more guts than him. He says that our lifestyles and life’s experiences are very different. His parents were brutally murdered on their farm two years ago. It is very sad and upsetting. This man must have so much anger and hatred in his heart because of this. He tells me of his journey the past two years and the work that he is doing in helping other farmers, including black farmers, to farm green and sustainably (winner of the Green Economy 2013 Award). I sense that it’s not an easy road; and I know it is still a looooong road. I ask him if he will accept a copy of the book, whether he will read it. Maybe it can help in building bridges between people, within people. He accepts the gift. When he drops me off, I tell him that he has more guts than me and is on a special journey of forgiveness.
The owners(Anette and Tinie Vosloo) and staff of Hunters Lodge in Tolwe took me in and looked after me. They refused to take payment from me and even packed a lunchbox for the day ahead
This is Johanna. She asked me whether I really travelled all over and why don’t I stay at home where I am safe. She asks this out of concern for me. I tell her that I have stories about love to share with people. She takes a look at the book and asks whether I really stayed with all these people. “You even stayed with us black people?” When I say yes, she cries, hugs me. “We don’t have people like this over here” – Sad. How are we treating one another?
The staff from Hunters Lodge knew that I was heading for the Pedi Trustland. In the morning they call me – they’ve found a lift for me with Ismail Phalafala. He has a few shops around the area and was buying supplies in Tolwe. He has so much knowledge about the Trustland and tells me the names of rivers, settlements, trees and share local stories. Oh and he also shares his vetkoeke. Yum! When I thank him, he says that at first he thought I was a foreigner because I was willing to travel with him and because I was friendly.
Meet Algreen. Another person benefiting from Ismail’s transport. She introduces herself as a business woman &tells me about the Forever Freedom Aloe Vera products that she sells. I’m not a big consumer. She understands. She is a Tsonga woman & I learn that she speaks all 11 of our official languages. I am embarrassed. I speak 2.1 languages. And then we talk about some of our unofficial languages. … See More
There are funny signs everywhere…
Pasop kgomo! Here we come. This is Pax (Pax Intrantibus) a few kilometres to Solly&Jacqueline in Bergerrecht – Pedi Trustland
Solly and Jacqueline Matlou (p174 – 176). Solly is one of my biggest teachers. His questions (Why is it ok for you, a white woman, to come here into the Pedi Trustland? And you know someone will take you in…What happens if I go there where you are from?) are crucial questions that we need to engage with. It is great to be able to honour their part in the journey and to open myself up to a whole new range of questions. I need to write a blogpost about this particular return visit. I also have the opportunity to get to know Jacqueline better. And find out that if Moloko was here, she would DEFINITELY not say ‘Tsamaya’ anymore!
It is great to see the positive changes in the lives of the Matlou family. They have a watertank! I Fed from a new borehole. Water is life. They now have fruit trees, a large vegetable patch and also have goats and chickens. I remember last time I was here, we took drums and drove to a point where they could buy water. My heart is happy to see them prosper. This is not the case for many of the uBuntu families. Jacqueline is also studying towards her Honours in Education Management through Tukkies (University of Pretoria)
I often arrived at someone’s home with padkos! (packed lunch – a gift from the previous host)
A letter to the Matlou family – written from the heart
Solly thanks me for taking the time and effort to work on the book AND to then bring it back to them. This is my thank you, I say
This is Baobab Tree country – Solly and Jacqueline gives me a lift to the Kromhoek Taxi rank. It was sad to say goodbye to them. Solly and I agreed that on my next visit, we will bring more people together and have discussions about connecting with one another. He says: “Us blacks, we want to be close with you. But you, you don’t want to be close with us” – I know this is not true for all, but I also know exactly what he means. Perhaps the 3rd trip around the country should be a provincial uBuntu families indaba
This was a gift from Solly&Jacqueline, bought from a vendor at the taxi rank. It is a fruit with very big pips that you suck on until all the flesh is gone – then you spit it out. It is called something like Phuphushe (but please correct me if I’m wrong! – I originally thought that it is called Poepietjies…)
Taxis are a wonderful lesson in patience. It is also the perfect place to meet people, have conversations and just to relax. It is best NOT to have an appointment set in stone beforehand; to be as flexible with your plans, as possible. Today, however, I am catching up with admin after 4 mostly receptionless, internetlessness days #myofficetoday
The man is in a bakkie. He calls me: “Madam”. I turn, ready to smile. He chucks something at me. An empty medicine bottle. And says some unfriendly words. Then shouts bye. Taunting . He wants to provoke me. I could immediately see what he sees. I white woman, ready to prescribe; perhaps telling him not to litter. I pause, wishing that the vehicle will pull over. I want to speak with him. What is his life like? Where does he live? What are his dreams? But they speed away. I feel sad. Empty. And walk ahead. I hear a booming thunder-like sound. Straight ahead, an old tree decides that it is time to lay down. Literally metres in front of me (see e-Trolls handle)
Yoh! Yoh! is all I can say. An old man, wearing a golden jacket, is on the other side. There are also some vendors under trees ahead. I walk towards them. The old man and I look at one another. He says: “God has a plan for us!” We hug. The vendors say that they are glad for us and that there were no cars on the road. “You are lucky!” We missed it by seconds. Perhaps the time it took to have an empty medicine bottle chucked at me.
After a short reunion and many potholes, we arrive at the Maluleka household in Mbokota. There are many introductions. Ma Fambisa Maluleka is the matriarch and Yvonne is her daughter-in-law. There is an instant bonding amongst all the children. When 3-year Otis sees Yvonne’s 10-month old (Ufanelo) on Yvonne’s back, he asks whether he can go on his mommy’s back too! Yvonne helps Marjan to do this with a towel.
The Maluleka Family are hosting seven (yes 7!) of us in their home in Mbokota. This special village takes up 7 pages in the book (p180-187). Pete Bosman (THE graphic designer) and I just could not let any of the pages fall to the cutting floor. In part, this is because this village really knows what it means to be in community. You will not find homeless people here. The other reason must be the Soccer Gogos! They usually meet up every morning at 6am to warm up, pray and play. Now that it is winter, they are only praying – every morning they gather at 8am. Today we are blessed to share in this with them
The time has come to hand a copy of the book to the Soccer Gogos – to thank them for their part in the story and for being an inspiration.
It is wonderful to see people find themselves, their friends and their community in a book.
(p180) In the early eighties, 20 or so women from Mbokota village, former Tsonga/Shangaan Homeland known as Gazankulu, got together to create textiles using the same symbols, patterns and colours that they were using to decorate their homes. In essence they founded a community-based cooperative business.
Meet Mama Elisa Maluleke(p181). She is one of the founding members of Twananani Textiles. She has officially retired, only to now cook for the creche that they have started there.
This is the Maluleka family. Jerry, Fungho, Ma Fambisa, Yvonne, Rose & a cousin. When I ask them what their message would be for South Africa, Jerry simply says that he wishes we would live together in harmony; that we would live together. “There are black people who have moved into former white areas, but we do not find many white people who are living here with us in community.” When I tell him that I’m upset about the news of Steve Hofmeyer& fans singing the old anthem, he says that yes, it seems that our brother is polarising us, when we should be working to become more socially cohesive. “We we are still very fragile in South Africa” – Yes, we are fragile
Yvonne is showing Othelia’s mom, Kubani Mkhari the book. She is one of the people with whom I did not have a language in common, yet simply felt at peace with. She was also one of the most active people I met. There are three images of her in the book (p182, 183, 186)
Othelia calls her sister, Joyce Mkhari to come over. Joyce was the one who originally showed me how to move/shake in the Xibelani skirt (p187). Our host, Ma Fambisa Maluleka happens to make and sell Xibelani skirts. We could not believe her when she told us that it takes 36 m of fabric! Well, today it is Marjan and Claudia’s turn to shake shake it! (Pictured here: Claudia, Othelia, Marjan)
When we arrive back home, it is to a dish of Tihove , which was prepared for us by Yvonne’s mom, Mdjadji. It is a cooked dish using ground peanuts (being ground in the photo), samp and beans. It is DELICIOUS. I have a second helping and finish the Tihove left on the children’s plates.
We want to support this community and what better way, than to buy some of their homemade, handmade textiles. I am placing an order for a shoulder bag with bead details and Marjan is attracted to the cloths. I see Belgium becoming brighter . For more info about Twananani: http://www.openafrica.org/participant/Twananani-Textile
Ma Fambisa Maluleka gets up every morning at around 3:30 am to start making her beautiful Xibelani skirts and to prepare the house for the awakening of the others (ie filling the urn and getting it going for everyone’s bath water). And a lot of the time she has little 10-month old Ufanela on her back. The grandchildren adore her (here she is with Fungho on her lap) – In the holidays, they love sleeping in Gogo’s room. She gives up her bed so that they can all sleep together in a make-shift bed on the floor.
In the Mbokota story (p180-187) there is mention of and a quote by The Mbokota Pure Holy Boys: “You strike a woman, you strike a nation” from their song ‘Stop Abuse’. This is Helani Dlomu, the leader and composer. This is their copy of the book to thank them, as men, for standing up and speaking out; for being positive role models to young men. I asked him what inspired the lyrics of the song. “I love women very much. And that is why I’ve got a family. I love my wife. Since we have been married in 1986, I have never parted ways with her. I love her so much. When I see other women that are suffering, I feel not right. That is why I composed this song.”
We wanted to take a walk around the village and Jerry thought that we’d also enjoy Xifarafara Waterfall, so we went on an outing. Beautiful, sacred space with sweet mountain water. Thanks Jerry!
Xifarafara Waterfall
Marjan making shade
It is time to leave ;( the Maluleka family and we are heart-sore. But noy before contact details are exchanged between Yvonne and the Belgium contingent – I am fortunate that it will be far easier for me to return to visit this beautiful family
I bought a shoulder bag (the perfect size for the ubuntu girl book) and the ladies from Twananani Textiles allowed me to design a pattern for it. I showed them what I liked and asked them to also do something that ‘looks’ like uBuntu – uBuntu is not a straight line
LONG STORY: Jerry escorted Marjan&gang to the Tzaneen road &dropped me off at a taxi point. Yes, we are parting ways again! I’m off to Thohoyandou/Sibasa/Phiphidi Falls. I catch a bus instead of a taxi. When it cones to paying, there is some upset because the price is set at R15 – the usual bus fare is R10 – some of the commuters say that it’s due to the presence of a white person on the bus. Fair(fare) comment. I am not offended, digging in my bag for my wallet. Digging deeper. My new bag does not have my wallet! I get up and start searching my backpack. The commuters get wind of this and it is not long before I have people helping me look through e-Troll, backpack, new shoulder bag, old shoulder bag! The only thought going through my head is: How am I going to pay the bus driver? He finds out what is happening and starts asking me, quite aggressively, how I am going to pay for the fare? He repeats the question. I DON’T KNOW! I phone Yvonne. She can’t hear me. I message her: Yvonne, did I leave my wallet there? I have very little reception. The message is not going through; the bus keeps going. Yvonne phones: “YES, we found it. Where are you?” I have NO frigging idea…the woman next to me takes the phone calmly and speaks with Yvonne in Venda. She shouts at the driver. She turns to me: “The driver will drop you off now at Matsilele. Your friend is coming with your wallet.” The bus stops. I look at the driver. How am I going to pay? He says maybe we’ll meet on this road again. He is not angry. Everyone shouts: Matsilele. Matsilele over the sounds of the engine, so that I know where I am. Waving hands. Bye
The bus is gone. I feel stupid. Jerry&Yvonne will now miss church! Grrrrr! Frazzled, I look around. There is another commuter: James Maanda Khadi & he is a politician. GREAT! Just last night Jerry and I had a discussion about politicians. He suggested that I send a copy of the book to the presidency. I told him that I did not think they cared and that I struggle to build social bridges into their terrain. Jerry spoke kindly, pointing out that regardless of my sentiments, our leaders are our leaders. I feel that he will be my teacher with this. When James learns about this he says. “We care about the people”. I’ll have to work on my pre-conceived ideas
Nkhumi Tshivhase and her family were my hosts in Phiphidi Falls. She has been following the return journey on Facebook and is SO excited to meet the other families in the book. This is what it is about. She is still working at Thohoyandou Victim Empowerment Programme, where we met through Fiona Nicholson
One of my favourite South African ways-of-life is the way we walk part of the way with someone when they’ve come for a visit.
Hosts Felicity and Fiona Nicholson from Thathe(Sibasa). Fiona is the founder and current and Programme Director at Thohoyandou Victim Empowerment Programme (TVEP) which is mentioned in the book p177, 178, 179. TVEP supplied me with and taught me how to use the female condom in the original uBuntu journey. They were concerned about my safety. For more info on them, please visit: http://www.tvep.org.za
This young girl stole my heart the moment we met. This is THE Woo whose story I have, and will continue to, spread far and wide. Woo was born HIV positive (she says: I was born postive!). She has taken this adversity and turned it on its head. She has been facilitating ARV workshops with children since she was 5 years old! She is remarkable and is here to teach us so much. She is a gift and a blessing. PLEASE like her facebook page: A life worth living. For her story in the book: http://live.fundza.mobi/home/library/non-fiction-books/the-ubuntu-girl/chapter-43/
Woo’s mom Sue-Anne with us
I simply do not have the stamina I had at 34!! On Facebook I haven been sharing the images of joyful reconnection with uBuntu families and meeting new people, though this is not the whole picture. There are also many moment of emotional fatigue: so many feelings and thoughts spoken, listened to, shared. I’m taking today off to be in silence x
In a taxi on the way to Tzaneen from Thathe Tea Plantation this morning: there was a lift (and good bye) from Fiona and Felicity; then a taxi to Thohoyandou (R10); a taxi to Malamlela (R13); a taxi to Giyani (R15) and this final taxi to Tzaneen (R60)
There is often curiosity in the taxis when people find out I’m South African. The cool thing is that this can lead to enlightening conversations. Meet Velly Mabunda (23) – He is studying BTech Cost and Management Accounting at the Tshwane University of Technology. He does not believe that uBuntu exists anymore: “There is a lot of corruption. I can not agree with this way -that somebody out there is suffering, whilst I am gaining. This is not uBuntu”. He spends 20 minutes reading the book and is fascinated. It is the most natural thing to give him a copy and ask him to donate it to the library of his University when he is done.
There was this little girl across from me who was very interested in what I was doing on my phone/laptop. We kept puling faces and smiling with one another, whenver I looked up. I asked her if she liked drawing. “Yes. Very much” I offered her some paper and my colouring pens. This is what she came up with. She pointed out to me which one I am. “Because you are tall and I am short”. I ask her if I can take a photo so that I can look at it when I want to. She pipes up with: “When you feel annoyed, you can just look at the picture. And then you’ll feel fine” – Ayibongwe Moyo (6)
Can you tell which one is Ayibongwe (6) and which one is me?
After a day of rest, I find the energy to notice the beauty in all things again. However, today in Tzaneen is a day of practical chores/shopping and prepping for speaking at a conference on Thurs in Johannesburg. This also means fresh laundry. Yeeeeeeeeeha
From the sublime to the ridiculous: Rural Limpopo to Magaliesburg; Grassroots to Corporate; 5* Hospitality to 5* Luxury. Sandwiched in between a haircut and a flight. Same message, same stories of love and hope
Waking up in the Bushveld
We stayed at Maduma Boma (a self-catering bush game estate) near Klaserie. It is awesome to experience this game estate with Marjan’s 6 year old Joshua – he has so many questions, and because of his interest in nature, he also has a few answers at the ready! http://www.madumaboma.co.za/
From CHILLY Gauteng to HOT Hoedspruit (34!) and later to a COOL Sabie
Our party of five will be staying with Mable Makhathini and family in Sabie (p201-203) for the next four days. Here she is with her nephew, Wilfred – the man from ‘Mountain on my plate’ (p202). The Makhathini’s and I have stayed in touch over the past 4 years and Wilfred often happened to call me when I was experiencing HUGE moments of doubts whilst working on the book. Today I can thank them for their support and faith in the journey. When I phoned Ma Mable to ask if we could stay with them her response was: “You are very welcome. ‘If you have a house, then it is for everyone, because when you die, you can’t take it with you”
A day of exploring God’s Window
Marjan, Wouter and kids (Joshua& Otis) have never been to Mpumalanga before, so we are planning a few touristy things. Ma Mable is too busy – she is a retired nurse, who has come out of retirement due to staff shortages. She will be working night shift for our entire stay, so will not be joining us. But her niece, Senzekile, joined us for an outing to Mac Mac Falls
Mac Mac pools
Ma Mable is reading the letter of gratitude to them. Afterwards, she says that they are very proud of this work that I have done. Earlier, she was congratulating her grandson, Musa, when he proudly presented his driver’s license to her. And just before that, Senzekile was showing Marjan and I her folder of assignments (she is handing it in soon) towards a diploma in Early Childhood Development. We were saying that we were impressed with how organised she is and of her work. This is a moment of deep connect with this loving family – It is also a lesson in the meaning of FAMILY
Some time out in nature
Beautiful land
Darling from Sabie (p201) finds herself in the book. She is happy to note that Gerty is also mentioned in the story. Gerty was her assistant, right hand, colleague, friend at the hairdresser. Gerty has since passed on. It has been a year but the loss that Darling is experiencing is still fresh. I wish there was a photo of Gerty in the book.
Darling from Sabie (p201) finds herself in the book. She is happy to note that Gerty is also mentioned in the story. Gerty was her assistant, right hand, colleague, friend at the hairdresser. Gerty has since passed on. It has been a year but the loss that Darling is experiencing is still fresh. I wish there was a photo of Gerty in the book.
Spent some time with the Ubuntu Community Care Centre in Simile – Sabie. This is Bridget Silinda – she is an unpaid volunteer who works with the youth in the afternoons as part of their after care programme. Bridget and the Ubuntu Community Care Centre has also been FunDza’fied! I am SO excited for the youth to read stories on their phones by FunDza via MXit
The Gogos really are the backbone of many communities in our country. Will we have a next generation like this, I wonder…? The Gogos from the Ubuntu Community Care Centre also feature in the book (p202-203), so a copy was donated to them. One of the Gogos recently passed away, so her friends were happy to see her in the book. For more info: http://granniesagogo.com/sitabogogo/
Another special Sabie resident and Ubuntu Community Care Centre volunteer, Hlengizwe Malele. We spoke for about an hour about whether uBuntu is still alive; about politics; and religion. He is concerned about teen pregnancies, drug use and alcoholism. “If only we can educate our children that their bodies are pure and teach them the need to abstain”. The Centre is lucky to have him volunteering at the after care programme with the youth.
Somehow, it is not possible for me to visit Sabie without popping into a creche! This happens to be the one that Senzekile works at. I took a photo of the classroom whilst the kids were playing on the jungle gym. LOVE all the colours.
It was an emotional reunion with Corrie van der Merwe from Mashishing/Lydenburg (hence the faceless photo – we were both in tears). The van der Merwes (p200) are the ones who ‘washed’ me in. Yes, on the original journey, when I declared that it was time to hit the road the next day, we were all sad and had a farewell evening ‘en elke ding!’. But I awoke the next morning to the shocking realisation, that they had taken my backpack, emptied all the clothes into the washing machine and declared that it will not be possible for me to leave!
Meet the Prinsloo/Steyn Family from Middelburg: Elmarie with Melenie on her lap and Murdoe with Elmire on his lap. We met on the uBuntu journey when they gave me a lift on Day 115 in the Northern Cape. They made me promise to call them if I found myself in Middelburg (Mpumalanga) and that’s how I ended up with them, 182 days later. We were reminiscing and Elmarie was saying that a lot has changed in 4 years. “Yes, your family has doubled since we last met!” It was great to meet the new additions
the ubuntu girl 